A Whole New … World? Aladdin Song About Sex, Childhood Effectively Ruined

Caution: I’m about to ruin some childhoods. ARE YOU READY FOR THIS OMGREVELATION? “A Whole New World” from Disney’s Aladdin is totally about foreplay. Don’t believe me? Sing along and really think about the lyrics (and your first time losing your V card or delivering/receiving a handy/blowie) as I break it down: . I can […]

Drunk in Love: That Time I Proposed to a Girl for Free Wine

I woke up drunk, which was pretty standard for a Friday morning in college. The night before was the annual Senior Semi-Formal; basically, it was an excuse to get dressed up like horny 18 year olds going to prom and binge-drink at a school-sponsored event somewhere in greater Ithaca. I don’t remember exactly where because, […]

Once Upon a Time in High School: “Catcher in the Rye”

***WARNING: This is the most ridiculous thing you’ll see in your lifetime. Please note that JD Salinger was not harmed during the making of this “film” 10 years ago. Although, had he known about it’s existence, he probably would have come out of hiding briefly to halt it’s production*** OK YOU GUYS. ARE YOU READY […]

‘All Those Naked Men Lined Up In A Row’ & Other Really Important Search Terms

That title got your attention, eh? When I started blogging again, I developed a new daily obsession. In addition to checking my stats so frequently that a clinical psychologist would say I have some unhealthy fixation with numbers, I can also see the Search Engine Terms that bring users to my blog via Google, Bing, […]